In 2 Cor 7 , Paul explains that God uses us to show tough love towards our brethren to bring about cleansing from "all defilement of flesh and spirit, perfecting holiness in the fear of God". We do not condemn our brethren, but hold them close in our hearts especially during their times of temptation and affliction. Though we may bring them to sorrow when we help them confront their sin, it is not "for the sake of the offender nor for the sake of the one offended", but that their sorrow would lead further into full repentance, "according to the will of God". We can rejoice together following this time of godly repentance, in renewed earnestness to obedience.